That Kind of Blood on Your Hands
by htbookreader1
Summary: night before the main battle in Pandora Jake/neytiri at the tree of souls. What has Jake been hiding from Neytiri? From himself? Oneshot inspired by jake's line "you dont want that kind of blood on your hands believe me." R R


**So, this is my first avatar fan fiction. I'm hoping that it goes well. I wrote this after i saw the movie a second time, got the idea in my head and what not. Its also a responce to the fact that avatar didnt win best picture which i personally wish that it had. It was beautiful and amazing and brilliant. Tell me what you think about this. Note: all the navi language i got using (i think) basically translates english to navi. Inspired by Jake's line "You dont want that kind of blood on your hands, belive me."**

That Kind of Blood on Your Hands

_Enwya doesn't take sides Jake._

He knew that. Of course he understood that the great mother of Pandora would not want to take sides in the upcoming battle.

_I wish I could say the same, and be that neutral._

But Jake Sully, former marine, had never been neutral about anything. There was always an argument that needed to be settled with a gun, or bloodshed. He had fought against ideals and concepts and peoples for so many years, that Jake had forgotten what it was like to fight for an ideal, or a cause, or a people.

_Almost _forgotten.

Jake still remained at the roots of the Tree of Souls. Neytiri stood beside him, intertwining her fingers with his.

"What are you thinking?" She whispered to him, breaking the silence.

"Tomorrow," he answered with eyes still fixed on the glowing tree.

Neytiri nodded. "We have prepared all we can."

"I know," he replied.

Neytiri could tell, sense even, that her mate's thoughts lay elsewhere. They were not on the coming dawn, on the battle…

"You are not here," she said looking into his eyes. "Your mind is somewhere else."

Jake shrugged. "You could see that could you?"

Neytiri nodded. "I see you."

Her mate, her soul, her eternity, chuckled slightly. But then his face turned somber. Jake was indeed restless. Perhaps it was the battle and what sort of sacrifices it would bring to the People. Sacrifices Jake did not want to bring about. Yet his thoughts were not on the battles of tomorrow, but of the wars of the past.

Jake shuddered as he heard their screams in his eardrums. He closed his eyes and he saw their faces, as clearly as he saw Pandora, or Neytiri.

Neytiri, concerned, stepped in front of Jake. She took his hands in hers.

"Tell me," she urged.

Jake opened his eyes. Neytiri was a good fighter. She was skilled with a bow and a knife. Yet, she, and her people did not know war in the same way as Jake knew wars. The Nav'i would have avoided battle with the Skypeople. But the Skypeople went looking for bloodshed in distant lands that did not belong to them.

And Jake had once been part of that mission.

What had they called it?

Liberation.

Ah. Liberation makes all the guns and death somehow fade from the history books. Liberation turns killers into heroes.

"Remember I told you," said Jake softly, "that I was a warrior and part of the Jarhead clan?"

Neytiri nodded.

Jake sighed. "In the past the Jarhead clan has hurt and killed many Skypeople. I've…" Jake stopped and took a deep breath. "I've killed many Skypeople."

Neytiri was silent.

"We thought," said Jake looking deep into Neytiri's eyes, "that we were fighting for something. But really, that's just what the ones back home believed, or wanted to believe. The Jarhead clan didn't really think about that, about causes or justice. The men in charge just pointed to the enemy and we shot them."

Neytiri's lovely eyes grew wide. "Jake."

Jake looked down in shame. He was full of such disgrace, and disgust at what he had done. At what he had let his hands do…Though he was now part of the Nav'i, in action as well as in look, he still felt as small as a human. His hands were still bloody with the past.

"I have killed innocence and trudged through countries that were not mine. I have been a butcher, a killer, an automatic machine gun."

The war torn youth raised his eyes to the wonder of the Tree of Souls. And, he saw past the tree to all the wonders of Pandora. There was so much beauty in every step and path one traveled. There was too much for the eyes alone to take in. It could all have been one long dream, one too beautiful and pure to wake up from.

_How could you, a trigger happy marine, ever be able to protect this land?_

He did not realize that Neytiri took his face in her hands. His eyes were suddenly thrust from the beauty of Pandora to the hidden depths behind Neytiri's eyes.

Jake saw that there were tears in her eyes. "My Jake," she said in a whisper, "you are not the same as you once were. You speak of a man who butchers and kills for money, or glory, no reason. But I have seen you these past months. I have seen you use your eyes, and your heart. I have seen you take command of our protection, of our people in a way that none have before. I have seen you fall into the heart of this land, of the people, of…" Her voice trailed off.

"Of what?" he asked her.

Neytiri smiled through the tears. "Of me."

Jake wiped a tear from her eye. "How can you still love me even though I have done such wrongs?"

"Very easily," said the woman who held his heart in her hand. "You realize what you have done. You see in your eyes the pain you brought to others, and it hurts you too, gives you pain. That is someone who is more than a warrior, more than a machine, more than a killer."

Jake was silent.

"That is a man," she said passionately still holding his face in her hands as if he would disappear. "That is a true man."

Jake's lips grazed Neytiri's forehead. "Thank you."

Neytiri closed her eyes at the feeling of his touch. "Why?"

"You're not gonna like it," he teased.

She let go of his face. "Why not?"

Jake shrugged. "You sure you want me to tell you?"

Neytiri nodded.

Jake smiled and bent down to whisper in her ear, "Because you bring out the human in me."

Neytiri clicked her tongue and lightly hit his arm. "Scoun."

"I mean it in a good way," he said. "In the best way. On Earth, bringing out the human in someone is a good thing."

The woman accused of making Jake human, put her hands on her hips. "How?"

"It reminds us that we're flesh and blood like everyone else. It is a way of saying that that person brings out a softer, caring side. A side I've never been accused of having."

Neytiri smiled. "Fine. But," at this she held up a finger to Jake, "don't go around accusing me of making you anymore like the skypeople."

"Never, Kawkrr," said her beloved wrapping his finger in hers.

"Nga yawne lu oer," said Neytiri

Jake pretended he had no idea what she said. He cocked his head to one side. "Sorry, what was that again?"

"Nga yawne lu oer," she said for the second time.

Jake thoughtfully stroked his chin. "And that's what exactly?"

Neytiri groaned. "I love you, scoun!"

Jake chuckled. "Nga yawne lue oer."

"You knew all along," she said with irritation.

"You're not going to take it back are you?" he asked with a smile.

Neytiri shook her head. "No."

She kissed him gently. "I'm going to sleep now. Will you join me?"

Jake nodded. "In a minute."

Neytiri left Jake alone by the Tree of Souls. He turned to the tree and knelt down on one knee. He took a deep breath, letting his lungs fill with the air that would have killed him as a human. He closed his eyes and felt connected to everything that moved through the forests, or just swayed in the wind.

No matter what happened tomorrow, he would never forget this feeling. Neytiri was right, he was not the same man he had been on Earth. He was so much more now than he ever dared he could be. He wondered what his brother would think if he could see Jake now.

Jake smiled at the thought of his brother, something he had not done since he heard about his brother's death.

"I miss you," he whispered.

"You were the genius," said Jake opening his eyes and seeing his brother's face in his mind, "and I was the fighter. And we loved you, I loved you for that. I saw in you a light I did not think I could ever possess. And since you looked like me I let you have that light alone and carry it like an eternal torch. But I know that I have that light in me. I have that spirit in me as well."

Jake took another breath and stood up.

"Hahaw nìltsan tsmukan," he said softly and left the tree in silence.

_Sleep well my brother.  
_

**What do you think??? make it into more than just a one shot...i was thinking of going into jake's past..your thoughts??**


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